I saw this display at the school library:


"Take a leaf to make a wish."

The Wishing Tree!
About two years back I stopped making birthday wishes because I had had everything I'd wanted. It seems, though, that I will always remember 2006 as the year intent on rudely shattering these accumulated feelings of contentment. (MAJOR exams! Parents divorcing! Parents NOT divorcing! Parents not so much discussing as shouting divorce! Having to babysit parents! Sprained ankle twice! Mr X left! Blahblahblah)
Evidently this 2006 Effect is very apparent. A few days ago my classmates were trying to decide the fate of a chocolate bar when one of them suggested that I should have it, because "she'll get into One Of Her Moods", One of Her Moods being the one where every word I utter rightfully belongs in a high-strung Elizabethan tragedy, the part where everyone on stage dies. Someone placed the chocolate in my bag and patted it contentedly with the instructions, "In case of emergency, use this." The emergency came about an hour after that. But arguing that I like this melodrama is like saying I enjoy screaming out in pain while being tied to four horses set to gallop in four different directions so that my limbs are torn apart joint by joint. Not very enjoyable at all, I assure you.
So I decided that I had every right to take a few 'leaves' from the tray, and made some wishes:

Then Z dared me to write this, so I did (and anyway, it's a good wish):

But I'd forfeit the 10 million for this one*:

(Ignore the tiny text; that was a private joke.)
(*Terms and conditions apply. I would sooner take the money than a guy who doesn't love me. But I still believe that it was nothing more than a set of unfortunate circumstances...)
My fingers are crossed =)
I know keeping any hope alive might be merely setting myself up for more disappointment in the future but it's the way I want to live, at least for now. I can't be bothered to make myself believe that he doesn't mean anything to me, especially because have I mentioned that Angelique is SUCH a bitch to argue with? I think about all the times Mr X was an ass and convince myself that I should run my car over him again and again and again, then a neuron up there fidgets and sneezes and I remember I let go of those grudges a long time ago, I remember his forgiveness and kindness and too much; so quiet I can hear the moments trickle by, our struggle to put forth verbal arguments because the other half would rattle off a contentious point then prevent a rebuttal with kisses.

Anyway, my monotonous sob story aside, I was wondering what you guys would wish for, if you had just one wish. And you can't wish for any more wishes; genies don't fall for that one anymore! I mean, genies can't be that stupid...
If you want me to write down your wish and drop the leaf off at the College Wishing Tree (that's what I call it, anyway), just for fun, leave it in the comments box. Just try not to make wishes that might get me into trouble. =)
****
[Update]
I cut out smaller paper leaves and wrote down all your wishes!

Click for big and try to find your wish! I wrote your names on the back of the leaves. And yeah, my handwriting's tiny. =)
This making of wishes may seem trivial or meaningless but it means more to me than merely discarding pieces of paper with words written on it; it's a gesture brimming with hope. You can call me crazy but you can NEVER say that my heart is made of stone. I did this for y'all because I've visited despair and it's a bad place to be, because hope is empowering, and because I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you guys too. Yup. So if you've any more requests I'll do them, though I'm not going to take photos and all.
Anyway, as I scattered the leaves at the foot of the tree, the librarians (and, actually, pretty much every living thing) were staring at me as if I were leaf littering (Ha! Pun!) or planting (!) some secret tracking device in the pile.
It looks much more like a leaf litter (!) now though:

See the smaller red/orangey leaves? Those belong to you readers. =)
[/Update]
Labels: photolog, school, yayness
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